Metaphors
Being stuck. It is something we have all experienced at one point or another. Sometimes it can feel like being on one side of a very high stone wall. We keep trying to put our foot here, and our hands there, but no matter what we do, we can’t get enough traction to make progress to carry us over the top. We can see a strong hand hold ahead that looks like it should be secure enough to hold on to, but it seems risky to stretch our arms that far. Reaching for it may send us back down to the bottom.
What does that picture evoke for you? For me, it is a metaphor I used to describe the emotions I was feeling in a particular moment in my life. I love metaphors. I find them to be very powerful tools that I regularly utilize for myself and with my clients.
Master storyteller Stephen King noted in On Writing that metaphors enable people to “see an old thing in a new and vivid way.” He believes metaphors are like a kind of miracle that occurs between reader and writer. Beyond that, metaphors are an incredibly powerful tool that can be utilized to deliver a whole host of benefits. They can improve comprehension and there is evidence that supports that the use of metaphors changes the way we think of a concept on an unconscious level. I have seen this in action both personally as well as with my clients.
One of the greatest benefits of metaphors is they can lighten the load and turn down emotions – making a complex, seemingly overwhelming challenge seem contained. Metaphors are not threatening. They enable us to see ourselves succeed and imagine ourselves in a different way. A great metaphor allows us to become powerful, cunning, and confident, tapping into new ways of applying the many capacities we all have within ourselves.
That stone wall I was facing? I thought long and hard about what it meant to stretch for that hand hold that felt a bit out of reach. The risk was - I reached for it and fell to the bottom. Then what? Then I fall to the ground, take a few steps back, analyze the path I had taken from the perspective of having attempted to climb it and failed. I can then reach down, put some dirt on my hands to create better traction, and take a different path over. Option B is I reach for that far off hand hold - find out it wasn’t too much of a stretch after all, and I am up and over to the other side.
This picture I painted in my mind’s eye was so much less intimidating than the real-world challenge I was dealing with. That challenge had me paralyzed – unable to move out of shear fear of the consequences of any action. The wall challenge was just in my imagination – where I had the power to walk through each scenario and consider the risks and rewards. It was clear and contained. I was able to imagine a situation where I could conquer that wall. I could sense what it would feel like to get to the other side. The relief and joy I could have by slaying this giant. The process created calm, turned down the emotion, and offered clarity.
The next time you are faced with something overwhelming or challenging, take a moment to close your eyes and create a metaphor that describes how you are feeling. Reframe the challenge from a completely different perspective. Add a good dose of detail to the scene so you can really feel it and a little humor to the story to lighten the load a bit. I can promise you that developing the capacity to redirect your mind in this way will pay dividends.
I did get over that wall by the way. After I fell to the ground and took a few steps back to gain a different perspective – I realized that while the wall was quite high, it was not very long. All I had to do was take a few more steps back and go around it instead of over it. I was standing too close to the wall, to fully realize its scale.
Curious for more? Join me and a list of inspiring guests in my podcast as we discuss what it takes to get Beyond Neutral and drive forward to where you want to be.
